Posted by: mzunguchick | January 12, 2008

Raila speaks to Frost, but it’s OK, I have a plan!

Hey who needs Kofi Annan – when we’ve got David Frost doing his thing?

Frost interviewed Raila Odinga last night on the Al Jazeera English channel to “find the answers to the questions” about whether some form of power sharing “is enough for an opposition who feels cheated out of a rightful victory”, and whether Raila thinks “he will be the President of Kenya by the summer”? (You can watch the whole thing above, I did – and with my shite internet connection it was no mean feat I can tell you – and there was nothing new said as far as I can tell.)

Raila seems to say that Kibaki won’t talk to him and yet he is willing to talk to Kibaki. Yet Kibaki’s spokesman – Alfred Mutua – says that Kibaki is willing to talk to Raila and it is Raila that won’t do the talking.

We could now get yer man Frost to speak to Kibaki (and find out there’s no moving there either), and then …..

My goodness boys – I think a pissing contest is most definitely in order here. I’ll be the judge (or David Frost if you like as he seems to have taken his own stance to sort this all out), and whoever can piss the furthest wins, gets to be President for the next 5 years and we can all get on with our lives as usual. The travel ban can be lifted, the tourists can come back in peace, and the police will be jolly happy they can finally get out of their sweaty Ninja turtle outfits and get back on with making some cash out of people jumping red lights and doing illegal ‘U’ turns on the highway.

There we go .. all sorted ….

You’re Welcome!



  1. thought the same!!! maybe a wrestling match between the 2,at uhuru park ,and kivuitu should still remain the ref!!!! I wonder what will happen!!

    one guy is old and senile, have you met old stubborn wazee’s?. the other, i guess, needs only to curse in german!

  2. the wife can help in the ring.she has a deadly punch..oooh sorry,slap.deadlier than conjestina,remember conje the boxeress?

  3. A pissing contest! Now why didn’t I think of that. Or Frost. Or Annan.

    Hold on though: Would there be rows over who goes first? Who had drunk more? Who was downwind?

  4. Thanks Anon x 2 – a wrestling contest could be in order between the two although if Kivuitu is the ref then Kibaki will win for sure – by a small margin! Although if Lucy gets involved Raila won’t stand a chance, she’ll have slapped him before he has a chance to get into the ring! Our Conjestina has nothing on Lucy – apart from the fact that they both look as bad in a dress, and perhaps Conje needs to borrow one of Lucy’s smashing weaves!

    Primal – I most definitely think Kivuitu – the Electoral Commission chairman should be put downwind of both of them! But you’re right – there’s probably no chance they’d agree on who won anyway even in a pissing contest!

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